When I received the invitation to Kristen's baby shower (see post below for pictures) one of the first things I thought about - besides 'yay!', I get to see how Kristen's pregnant belly is growing - was who will be there and what will they think when they see me. Thoughts that followed included I really need to lose some weight before the shower and I definitely need a tan on these white legs. I had already been trying to loose weight but I can come up with some pretty good excuses for not sticking to a diet. We have been celebrating birthdays and going to a ton of wedding/baby showers where I just had to have something sweet because it was a special occassion. Also, if I have a bad day, I deserve a coke! As for tanning, who has time for that? The only time I am out in the sun these days is on the jobsite. Definitely not wearing shorts out there.
For some reason during this past week, I did not stress about going to the shower. I did realize that I was going to the shower to see Kristen and celebrate her pregnancy. I do care what she thinks; however, I believe she would still be a great friend to me no matter what I look like. Still, there is a part of me that does care. Why? All the girls from the shower have probably not even given me a second thought - good or bad!
Caden looked precious that day and many said so which makes me happy and so proud. I need to just focus on the good stuff. I am happily married to an awesome man and have 2 beautiful children. That is what I want people to see instead of seeing me.
Our high school reunion is coming up (this September). When I found out about it, once again my thoughts went straight to loosing weight, what will others think of how I am looking now and what I am doing now. I know all of this is normal stuff, but I really wish that I did not care. I have been praying about this and believe that God is the reason I did not stress about the shower last week.
Also, somewhere inside me I know that I need to loose the weight for me - not for people I have not seen in 10 years and probably won't see again for at least that many more. But it is hard to loose weight when you have a husband that tells you how good you look even when you don't. I am so lucky!
Who made up the rules for acting like a girl?
8 years ago
4 comments:
Aww girl...you look great, seriously. I hate that you have been dealing with that. You are beautiful! Love you girl!
Amy~ Thanks so much for sharing your heart. I'm so sorry you have struggled with this. I totally understand what you are going through though. It is so hard not to care about what others think. I know that I can make myself very upset about weight and other stupid things. I will pray for you as your reunion comes up. For what it's worth, I think you look amazing and you definitely looked cute at the shower this weekend from looking at pics!
i just want to say you are definetley a beautiful girl. I mean anyone that can put up with my brother is a beautiful person. (ie... you and me HA HA)Actually Kirk said the last time we saw you that you looked like you had lost some weight and you are so petite that you are never big even when you think you are. I always think I have to lose weight and everyone says but your so tall. So i know what you mean. And if that is what you want to make yourself feel better i know that you will commit when the time is right for you. A day in the sun for beautiful 4th of July just might sure that tan thing or atleast a good start. Love Ya Guys
I just want to say that you are very beautiful and I have always thought that!!! I remember I have always envied you for your golden tan. I am still just completely thrilled that you made it to the shower. It means so much to me. You truly are the bestest friend I have ever known and will ever have. I am so glad we never let is slip away. The pictures are adorable and that is so cute how you posted them. I love you very much and we need to get together again soon!!!! P.S. I am getting bigger! Love, Kristen B.
Post a Comment